When someone important to us dies, we usually feel sad - sometimes very sad.

We often have a mixture of other feelings too. We may feel lonely, hurt, confused, empty, guilty, afraid or angry - even relieved.  Sometimes these feelings can be very strong and confusing.

It usually helps to talk to someone who will listen and try to understand how you feel.

Who would you choose?

Maybe someone in your family, a teacher, a dinner lady, friend, doctor, someone in a youth group, church or social worker. You may feel able to talk to one of these people.

REMEMBER that:

• It is OK to show how you feel.

• Being naughty or saying horrid things to people is not what makes them die

• Understanding why someone died can be helpful so don't be afraid to ask questions.  "What caused your important person to die?", "What happens to their body?"

• The awful sadness you may be feeling will go away in time - it's hard to say how long it will take

• It's not that you will forget the person who has died buyt you will slowly get used to that person not being around

• It's OK to have fun and be happy in between the sadness

OTHER PEOPLE'S REACTIONS

Some people will be helpful, show they care and will be there for you and your family. They will be willing to listen or talk.

Other people, even your friends, may be afraid of upsetting you and making you cry so they keep away for you. They don't mean to be nasty, they just don't know how to help you.

MEMORIES

Good memories are treasures we can keep forever.

There are lots of things we can do to keep those memories ... look at photographs, talk about the person who has died, draw pictures, keep precious things and go to special places.